RELAX!!!!

Dat's one word i need to bear in mind, bear in mind, bear in mind:

RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAXRELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX RELAX

dun think dat's helping.. bloody hell.. i must say dat metal mouthpieces are fuckin difficult to blow.. i'm just wondering, if i could produce such a beautiful sound on my ebonite hard rubber Yamaha 4C mouthpiece with correct embouchure and firmness and all, then why the hell cant i do the same for my F. Lebayle Matte Gold Platted Studio Model Metal mouthpiece?!?! WAT IS WRONG WITH ME????

Anyway, i figured a few possibilities:

1. The 4C has a smaller tip opening and a longer facing which makes it easier to play. the bore and outer dimensions are also bigger than the Lebayle Studio.

2. The Lebayle studio has a 2mm plus tip opening and a damn short facing like 1.3cm - 1.5cm which combined makes it damn difficult to control.

Plus, i need to adjust from a larger bore to a smaller bore on the Lebayle Studio and it's just different. noticed also dat rolling more lip over the lower teeth gives the embouchure more stability and produces a clearer, rounder sound. but my high register still needs work.

And hell , i cannot afford to tense up! which is easier said than done because there's no need for much control to tense and bite hard but ALOT OF CONTROL is needed for a very very RELAXED YET FIRM lower lip, which i am havin a bloody hard time with. too loose, no sound.. too hard and the damn squeaks start comin out.. shit man, life is tough..

i think i need to take note:

1. DUN CHANGE THE FREAKIN EMBOUCHURE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! it's bloody difficult but yea..

2. roll more lip over lower teeth for firmer embouchure.

3. DUN BITE HARDER WHEN PLAYIN HIGHER NOTES!! JUST MAINTAIN STABILITY OF THE LOWER LIP!!

wat else.. ah yes..

4. bitch slap myself if i do it wrongly, bitch slap some more if i still cant get it right, bitch slap myself silly till the cows come home UNTIL I GET IT RIGHT!!

5. practise practise PRACTISE and PRACTISE SOME MORE till the sky falls down on my head.

thank god for 2 weeks of break. i've been given 4 lessons to prove dat i can make this damn thing work, 4 lessons which means.. 2 freakin weeks.. 2 WEEKS! if not, i'm back to my yamaha 4C and i'm already beginning to hate dat piece.. i think it sucks and hell i dun wanna be touching dat anymore once i master the Lebayle, if i do master it dat is.

i actually GOT IT during lesson today, at one freakin point in time. but then i forgot the position and grip and pressure, and dat sucks. it's fine, i WAS there, but i'll be there again in no time.

i went down to Accent Music after lesson today and hell, they dun have any more stock for the PowerTone removable baffles and wats worse, they said dat the original manufacturer has stopped production of this. I DUN UNDERSTAND!!!! WHY DISCONTINUE A GOOD PRODUCT?! wat's wrong with ppl these days man.. dammit, i think i gotta order via the internet again lah crap.. damn pay more shipping charges and all.. hell.. u know wat.. i think i'm gonna get a cold bath, and then head off to the supermarket and get some snacks.. i needa chill awhile..